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Archive for April, 2010

Lines I do not want to see ever in an article on golf:

“[Tiger]’s still my favorite golfer,” the 6-year-old said. “I don’t care what he did.”

So, thanks for that, David Newton.

Your 6-year-old has no capacity to evaluate this situation.  I hope.  You should not ask him to evaluate this situation.  Because that would involve telling him about it.  Which is really not appropriate.

I understand the difficulty here: you may not want your child to grow up idolizing Tiger Woods, simply because Mr. Woods is an excellent golfer, because you think that Mr. Woods is a skeezeball.  This is awkward, because the details are not the sort of thing you tell your 6-year-old and, moreover, your 6-year-old has no frame of reference for these details.

My suggestion?  Prompt him to like a different, more admirable golfer.  Also, don’t let him talk to creepy reporters who ask him questions he should not be able to answer.

Still hot. Still pantheriffic.

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Listen up, people.  It has come to my attention that NBA mascots are all messed up.  Please note the following:

The New Orleans Hornets will henceforth be known as the New Orleans Jazz.  The Utah Jazz will be known as the Utah Raptors, or Utahraptors, if you like.  The Toronto Raptors will move out of Canada, because seriously?  The relocated team will be known as the Bobcats.  The Charlotte Bobcats, then, become the Charlotte Hornets.

Glad we cleared that up.  Here’s a picture of Dwyane Wade.  We’ll work on fixing that spelling at a later date.

The Heat can stay the Heat. Because Miami is hot.

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