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Posts Tagged ‘cycling’

Nice kits! From left: Fabian Cancellara, Fränk Schleck, Andy Schleck.

They are Leopard Trek!  And they are awesome!  And I really really hope they win the Tour this year, because who likes Contador?  (Shockingly, we still don’t.)

Here is Leopard Shleck’s (Am I the first to do that?  I hope so.) website.  Not a lot there, yet, but I’m sure there will be.  And maybe the official Twitter feed will be slightly more literate (if far less endearing) than those of the various members.

Nice scarves, too. Thanks, lads.

And because whyever not:

Certainly our and possibly THE favorite.

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The Schlecks are still awesome.

There’s no content here, just a cute photo.  Team presentation soon, and Fränk seems excited about the kit, so that should be interesting….

Fränk is über-suave.

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Cancellara is joining Team Schleck!  No, we’re not surprised, but we are thrilled, and Alberto Contador can go jump in a lake.

Adorable, right? And that's not even a very good picture.

Pretty much the cutest story I’ve ever heard about cycling is when Mr. Cancellara took the Schlecks around the Annecy time trial course and tried to point out to them how best to attack it.  And then they were still bad.  But somehow that made it even cuter.

So here’s to more success!  And being cute.  And not being able to spell.

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He says he won’t be Team RadioShack’s lead rider.

Kit is skeptical, and on reflection I am too.  Because if it turns out that Mr. Armstrong can win, he’s going to win.  I’m not sure how much he cares who wins as long as it’s not Alberto Contador, but he wouldn’t mind, certainly.

But the point of this post is more that Andreas Klöden is awesome and we wouldn’t cry if he ended up as RadioShack’s lead rider.

Seriously, what is not awesome about this guy?

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Stop. Doing. Drugs.

I really don’t understand why cyclists do drugs.  I am, on a related note, glad that Mikel Astarloza did not fill the “Basque” category on Team Awesome, because he is a cheating moron.

If you are a cyclist and you are doing drugs, you will get caught.  And then you will get banned.  You will lose your title.  This is in sharp contradistinction to all other sports, where people tend not to get caught, and, if they do, nothing happens.

How is this so hard to understand?

This year was great at the Tour, because there was no horrible doping scandal.  There still isn’t really, because Mr. Astarloza’s not a huge deal, and he may not have been doping during the Tour, so it’s not soul-crushing in the same way as the Floyd Landis case.

But.  My point here is: even if you’re not going to get caught, and even if, having been caught, nothing happens to you, you shouldn’t do drugs.  It’s not fair, it’s not decent, it’s not honorable.  Those are three strikes.  Additionally, it devalues your sport.  Why would you do that?

Cute!  American!  Probably doesn't do drugs!

Christian Vande Velde: Cute! American! Probably doesn't do drugs!

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The Tour is over and we are devastated.  To buck us up, we have decided to do an All-Star Team of this year’s riders.  It’s not a team we think would win, but it is made up of some of our favorite riders, favorites for reasons of their being awesome.  This is a team post, so Dottie’s contributions will be marked with a D, and Kit’s with a K.  Pretty self-explanatory, there.

voigt awesomeJens Voigt (left), for being quite possibly the most chipper man alive.  Sure, I slid down a large mountain under my bike for a while, and I was bleeding into my skull, but doesn’t it suck that they won’t let me back on the bike on time to do the tour of Denmark?  Also, check out my killer tan lines. (K)

hincapie awesomeGeorge Hincapie (right), because he broke his collarbone and refused to see a doctor so he wouldn’t have to withdraw.  He got screwed out of a yellow jersey and was not a little girl.  I have never been screwed out of a yellow jersey, but I have broken a collarbone and I have cycled on cobblestones.  Both at once seems like the worst thing ever. (D)

txurruka awesomeAmets Txurruka (left), because he is Basque, and super scrappy, and has a totally awesome name.  He had to drop out very late in the Tour because of crash injuries, which must have been miserable, especially after a second place finish into Colmar. (D)

renshaw awesomeMark Renshaw (right), because he’s the best lead-out man there is.  Being a great lead-out man seems fairly similar to being the excellent and oft uncredited offensive line in front of any great quarterback, except without the benefits of being allowed to weigh 350 pounds.  It was great to see him take second in Paris, and I hope Cavendish bought him a lot of beers. (K)

wiggins awesomeBradley Wiggins (left), because I like justifying Kit’s claims about my anglophilia, and he had the best overall finish ever by a Briton, which is pretty nice.  Also, stage racing isn’t really his thing, so double points there, and he seems not to mind being called “Wiggo,” which makes him a champ. (D)

klöden awesomeAndreas Klöden (right), because I heard a lot of complaining out of Astana when Contador inexplicably dumped Klöden in the Alps, but the complaining wasn’t coming from Klöden.  In fact, what with all the “Lance is ruining everything” and “Contador hates his team” nonsense, I think most of us missed Klöden’s 6th place finish, which turns into a 3rd if he finishes Stage 17 with Contador and the Schlecks. (K)

cancellara awesomeFabian Cancellara (left), because he did not murder Alberto Contador with an axe after losing the final time trial by two and a half seconds, for which he deserves a prize.  Also, he is hilarious and adorable and has sweet tan lines, which he very kindly exhibited to us on the final stage. (D)

knees awesomeChristian Knees (right), because his name is Knees.  Come on. (D)

haussler awesomeHeinrich Haussler (left), for losing it at the Stage 13 finish line.  There is little that confirms what is great about sports more than the sight of a grown man weeping for joy upon a victory. (K)

And an Honorable Mention.

fränk awesomeFränk Schleck (right), because he is absolutely selfless, and does not have a silly Tintin tuft of hair coming out the top of his helmet as his brother does.  Also because people love the Schlecks, and we are not above strategic name-dropping.  And in case you were wondering, we have no idea if he has a girlfriend. (D)

Any glaring omissions?  Are you convinced that Christian Knees is not in fact awesome?  Let us know!

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He seems like a pretty great guy.  He wins stuff.  He goes up mountains really fast.  He has a cute kid.

He has a sweet bike.

I want this bike, but I bet it would look like swank.

I want this bike, but I bet it would look like swank.

He has good-looking team-mates.  He has truly fascinating hair.

He also has a soul patch.

He generally doesn't look this startled.

He generally doesn't look this startled.

FIE!

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